if you were wondering...

how long a treadmill runner can run outside with lots of hills in the pollen and heat, the answer is about a mile.

If you were wondering how long it takes for a happy, playful toddler to go from extremely adorable to extremely naughty, the answer is about 2 minutes or exactly how long it took him to have a successful #2 after we arrived at the playground 1.5 miles away from home.

If you were wondering how many people stare at you while you force a kicking and screaming toddler into a jogger, the answer is around 30...or the equivalent of however many people are at the playground.

If you were wondering how many contacts an allergy sufferer can lose during a 3 mile walk, the answer is 2.

If you were wondering how many males and females I passed on the 1.5 mile walk back home, I can't tell you because I couldn't see anything.

If you were wondering how long a toddler can scream during a 1.5 mile walk, the answer is about a mile...OR the equivalent of the time it takes for you to realize you have games on your phone.

If you were wondering how long it takes you to stop being frustrated with said toddler for causing the biggest scene to date, it's about an hour...or the time it takes to get him bathed, fed, and sitting at the dinner table where his daddy tells him to say sorry to mommy.

If you were wondering how long it takes for you to forget why you were even mad when a 2 year old tells you he loves you, the answer is 2 seconds.

If you were wondering what mommy's eyes look like after all is said and done:

If you were wondering how many days it takes for mommy to try the playground again, it's TBD.

I'm guessing in May...or about when allergy issues slow down for this mommy.

punchy.

I am feeling quite punchy today.

A little silly, a little sassy.

Some people call it delirium, but I call it punchy.

It all started in the early morn with a toddler who was REALLY mad that I wouldn't give him milk for his on-the-go Cheerios.

Madness ensued for about 20 minutes.

20 minutes of hysterical crying.

I walked out the door to let Bella out and start the car - crying.

I walked out to let Bella back in - still crying.

I gave him treats to give to Bella.  He took them, but was still crying.

Said goodbye to Bella...........crying more.

Got in the car, gave him his rejected Cheerios, sang a song, tickled his feet.

Still friggin' crying.

About 5 minutes into the drive, he stopped.

Then I laughed. 

Because that's what you do to keep from crying yourself.

Who cares if you look like a complete looney toon?

At least he thought my laughing was funny.

Other fun things today has brought:

- Spit water all over myself.  I have no idea why or how it happened.

- The epiphany that my Whitney looks like Lauren Conrad.  Why didn't I see this before?

- Thoughts that maybe Whitney is LC and is just in hiding - Hannah Montanna style.

- Thoughts of what I will do with the money Whitney/LC gives me soon for being the best friend ever.

- Can I buy Peeta?

- Discovering that 'Catching Fire' doesn't come out on the big screen until Thanksgiving 2013.

- Drafting a letter to the production team of 'Catching Fire' about said discovery.

- Wondering what it would be like to be on the production team of the Hunger Games.

- Jennifer Lawrence is alright, but I'd be a better Katniss.

- Can I cast myself in my own movie?

- Would I have time for my family?

- What about naps?  Will there be time for naps?

I am in my own world today, folks.

Let me be.